Gallas 81 – Divers: none

ZZZZzzzzzz… snort… drool… ZZZZZZzzzzz… huh, wha? sniff… Hey, look! We won a match. Back in the top… fourrr… ZZZZZZzzzzzz….

Have I made my point? What a fucking boring piece of football that business was. The three points are very much appreciated, but my god were we ever playing on dead legs. Nice effort by William Gallas at 81′ to head one in while simultaneously getting the French punched out of him by David James. It was about time too. Opting for the 8-1-1, Portsmouth played a very closed match. Every time we got the ball down field it was a passing exhibit trying to find a crack to get in. But, Ol’ Tony Adams visit back to his old club sent him packing without a point to show for it when we finally got in on a corner. Now hopefully Hull can eviscerate Aston Villa in two days and we’ll keep our spot in 4th.

Next up, Plymouth visits The Grove for our first FA Cup tie for the season. Not sure what to make of that one. We’ve got a break until the following week with the Prem, so Arsène may play a pretty full squad. Well, as full as it can get with all the injuries. After that, it’s back to Prem action with Bolton and then another reaming by match against Hull City. If that can be considered a lull in the action, then we’ll take it. We need it to catch our breath and take stock.

Denilson 40, Diaby 48 – Divers: Eboue, Agbonlahor

So, I’m in the friggin’ Toys R Us getting my kids some toys with the gift cards they got from some friends/family over the holidays and this fellow who works there sees my Walcott shirt and says “Yeah Gunners… they tied the other day.” But, I haven’t seen the game yet and I say to my wife “I knew I shouldn’t have worn this fucking shirt today…” But I’m thinking to myself, “Ah, he’s an American. He’s probably talking about the Liverpool result or some match that happened weeks ago, not the Villa match from just yesterday.” So I go home and put my recording of the match on hoping this kid didn’t know what he was talking about. He did.

But, for 92 minutes I thought maybe he didn’t. Despite having most of the possession for the first half and only 2 shots on goal, we went into the tunnel up 0-1. Villa had piled on the pressure, rattling the woodwork three times and stretching Almunia left and right with nothing to show for it. But at 40′ a scramble in the area saw Denilson get to the ball before Friedel. Good Ol’ Yankee Brad gets nutmegged by the Brazilian and it’s one nil to the Arsenal.

Man of the Match for me has to be Bacary Sagna. At around 44′ a chip comes in and Almunia is off his line. Sagna simply flies in and makes a lovely reverse bicycle kick to clear it just before the line. It’s probably the  most gorgeous save by a defender I’ve ever seen. Bac made probably four or five other spectacular saves this match. He’s priceless, I’m telling you. Whatever he wants when the contract is up, give it to him.

So we come out for the second half, and three minutes in Abou Diaby struggles up the right, passes off to Emmanuel Eboue who then flicks off back to Diaby who buries it… 0-2 Arsenal. It’s at this point that I’m thinking, “The kid in the toy store had to be talking about the Liverpool match. Fucking plebe.” But he wasn’t. Gallas gave up a PK around 64′ when he cut down Agbonlahor. In real time it looked to be a clear penalty. The replay showed it to be a close call, but if I were the ref I would have given it. 1-2 after Barry buries. FFS.

Lots and lots of back and forth with Villa piling the pressure on all along. The 90th minute comes and goes and I get this feeling in the pit of my gut, I shit you not. I say to my sleeping wife and dog, “We’re going to get this one fucking nicked in the last few minutes.” And 30 seconds later, some claret and blue twat equalizes for the Birminghamininians. Whistle. Draw. Fuck.

And at said whistle, Martin O’Neill was heard to say, “Sweet sufferin’ Jesus! Orange stars, yellow moons, green clovers and blue diamonds! That was a great fookin’ match!” To which Arsène Wenger replied, “Get out of my sight, you fucking myopic leprechaun.” I always thought those two got on just fine, but it appeared at one point that Martin was trying to take a large bite out of The Professors’ ass. For one, I’m not sure that would taste very good, and two that there’d be very much left after the Arsenal board gets done with ol’ AW on recent numbers.

So, we’re ten points off the league leaders on Boxing Day. I’m no statisticianarian, but correct me if I’m wrong when I say that sort of mountain ain’t yet been climbed. It’s now a fight for the Champions League, get as close to the top four in the Prem and the FA Cup… in that order. And, there’s no room left in the injury room. Alex Song came off at the half bitching about an injury and they pretty much just sent him home. Good times.